Monday, December 24, 2012

Lifes Crossroads part 3



So here I am, sitting in a hospital room with Don by my side, now what? Lying on the end of the bed was the infamous hospital gown. Was I really going to have to wear that thing? My nurse came in and said she was going to insert my IV needle. Since I didn’t bring pajamas with me, only a pair of shorts I normally wear to bed, I grabbed the gown, went into the bath-
room and proceeded to put it on. For those who have never worn one, it is quite a contraption. It has snaps on the sleeves so you can open it up to go over the IV tubes. It has ties around the back of your neck which are to short to be useful and impossible to tie. There are more ties around the back of your waste which are absolutely impossible to see, feel or tie! Once again I had to lean on my son in law to make this contraption at least bearable. Note to self; have someone bring pajamas first on the list. One of the bright spots to this ordeal was the nurses. The nurse on duty when I arrived, Maria, was definitely a gift from God. God blessed me first by having Don there and once again by having just the right nurse during this scary time. She was funny, she was very proficient and she cared. She explained everything to me, she told me what to watch for; she said that if the other nurses didn’t do certain things I was tell them, “Maria said”. It turns out she was well respected by the other nurses and when I did say, “Maria said”, they listened. Now it was time to insert the IV. She had me lay back on the bed with my right arm at my side. She raised the bed to a height that she could work and prepared my arm for the needle. I’m not sure what Don was thinking but he was very quiet. I was thinking, here we go again since I have had more IV’s than I ever wanted. Sometimes they get the vein right away and sometimes they have to poke around. Which one was this going to be? PTL, there was no poking around, in the vein, taped down and ready for the infusions. She told me I needed to be out of there in four days or they would have to remove the needle and insert another since it can only stay in that long. I told her that would definitely be my goal, four days was way to long to be there.
            Alright now what? Don and I talked and watched some TV and wondered what was going to happen next. I don’t remember the exact timing but it was shortly after I arrived; I got my first visitor, Ken Bristol from church. I think the world of Ken and his family and it wasn’t surprising that he would take time in the middle of the day to come see me in the hospital. As usual he was in tune to the needs of others and I was learning more lessons. A little while later our Associate Pastor, Travis Cook, came by to visit. I was already beginning to see the caring coming from my natural family and from my church family and it had only been a few hours. Since I was immune-compromised everyone that came into my room had to wear a mask and if I went out of the room I had to wear a mask. I felt sorry for anyone that visited me for any length of time and had to wear that thing the whole time they were in the room.
            So here I was sitting in a hospital bed, which is very uncomfortable, with tubes running from the IV in my arm up to bags of antibiotics and fluids hanging from a pole and thinking all I want to do is get out of here. I knew I was sick but I didn’t really feel all that bad. Hospitals are full of sick people, was this really going to help me get well? They sent me something for lunch that was supposed to resemble food but I am not sure how. Great, an uncomfortable bed, a pole with fluids next to me that I had to take everywhere I go, sick people all around me, food that was in name only and no idea what was happening.
            God was already starting to show me many lessons and there were many more to come. I was already learning about the caring of others, and I would see a lot more of that, but I was also learning that it can always be worse. I was able to get up and walk around and after a few hours that is what Don and I did. Don removed his mask and I put mine on and I grabbed my pole and we walked the halls. This was the cancer wing and I observed the many signs outside the rooms along the hall showing the needs and limitations of the patients in the rooms. It was depressing but I started counting my blessings and realized how selfish I was feeling sorry for myself. Lest you get the wrong idea I didn’t immediately stop feeling sorry for myself, but lessons were being learned. Later in the afternoon Kathy came to visit and see how I was doing. She talked with the nurse and got a handle on all the technical stuff going on because of course I didn’t have a clue. After awhile Kim was finally able to come and visit. We had been in contact of course so she brought me some things from home including my pajamas. Needless to say, one of the first things I did was get rid of the dreaded hospital gown. Don and Kathy left and Kim and I were able to spend some time together. I felt so bad for her. She had to work extra hours, she was stressed, tired and was visiting her husband in a hospital and would have to return home alone knowing the process would be repeated the rest of the week.
            After Kim left I sat there alone, sort of, since someone was always coming in to check, prod, poke or adjust something. I was getting tired but I was going to learn quickly that you don’t get any rest in the hospital. I watched a little TV and did some reading but all I really wanted was to get some sleep. I lay down in the bed and tried to go to sleep. Between everything that was going through my mind, being in a strange place and someone constantly coming in the room to check, prod or poke sleep was not forthcoming. I tried all night long and around 0430 as I was just starting to drift off, the lights came on and a person carrying a basket set it down, grabbed my arm and said she was going to draw blood for my labs. So much for getting any rest. After she took my blood and slapped gauze on the wound, she turned out the lights and disappeared. Unfortunately I was to find out that she would return like clockwork on a daily basis.
            I laid there again trying to go to sleep but realized that was not going to happen. I figured I might as well get up, get cleaned up and start my day such as it was. I did my version of a sponge bath, still attached to my rolling pole with tubes running into my IV, changed my under-
wear, brushed my teeth and tried to make myself presentable. I sat in the chair next to the bed and started reading my Bible. This was something else I needed to do more of and it looked like now I had the time. Here was another very important lesson being learned. Although I was still in a place I didn’t want to be in, God’s word gave me comfort. It reminded me that I needed to focus on what was really important, I was learning lessons about relationships and how the other stuff was superficial. After having a short time of prayer with my Lord I was feeling a little calmer, albeit still very tired and hazy. Then the reality of where I was came into my room. It was another very nice person bringing me breakfast. I use the word breakfast lightly since the only resemblance to breakfast was that it was served in the morning. It was supposed to be a cheese omelet but it was nasty. Not only was I not going to get any sleep, it looked like I was going to lose more weight. My dear God, help me to learn my lessons quickly.

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